Fiat Chrysler Automobiles, or FCA, is the result of the ashes of the former Chrysler, Dodge, Jeep, and the really-fine ashes of AMC, combined with FIAT, Maserati, and Italy’s own taxi driver and drug dealer car of choice, Lancia.
San Andreas = drug dealer
By all accounts, the current Chrysler is the best it’s been in over 3 decades.
Gone are the disgustingly-identical badge-shared cars like the Dodge Intrepid and Chrysler 300.
Gone are the plastic-pieced Plymouths of the 90s where the air conditioner knob could break off in your palm.
the future!
We’re in the era of Chrysler building a class-leader like the sexy 200, Jeep’s truly splendid Grand Cherokee, and the barnstorming Dodge Hellcat.
Despite being a world-class bullshi**er, Sergio Marchionne has turned the company around dramatically.
So why is he trying to merge the company with GM?
It doesn’t sound desirable nor even legal for two of Detroit’s mega-companies to fuse into one nightmare monopoly.
But Marchionne is headstrong in this goal:
“It would be unconscionable not to force a partner,” he said.
That sounds like a hostile takeover bid is in the works.
“Not hostile,” said the FCA chief. “There are varying degrees of hugs. I can hug you nicely, I can hug you tightly, I can hug you like a bear, I can really hug you. Everything starts with physical contact. Then it can degrade, but it starts with physical contact.”
According to Jalopnik, Marchionne really isn’t interested in GM. It’s just a cover for who is sights are actually set on:
Geely.
“FCA’s got both the European and North American market share and penetration that Geely wants, long after its done experimenting with Volvo. Geely’s got all the market share and penetration in Asia that FCA wants. You can’t get more synergistic than that.”
The logic is sound.
But that doesn’t sound like who he’s *actually* interested in.
Listen to his justification for a merger:
Without specifying how he arrived at the figures, Marchionne cites a staggering combined EBITDA (earnings before interest, taxes, depreciation and amortization) figure that he says would result from the merger of FCA and GM.
“Look, the combined entity can make $30 billion a year in cash. Thirty. Just think about that [expletive] number,” he said. “In steady-state environments, it’ll make me $28 to $30 billion,” at a seasonally adjusted annual selling rate of 17 million.”
He’s not looking for Geely, or GM, or even a car company at all.
If he is indeed looking for someone to buy FCA, he’s looking for a tech company.
Think about it.
Apple and Google are both testing self-driving cars on public streets. It’s past the point of fantasy or even rumor — it’s going on right now.
but does it drift?
But what the hell do they know about building cars?
Meanwhile, Tesla is building and selling the automobile of the future: The Model S P85/90D.
LUDCRIOUS MODE
A vehicle with built-in, constantly-upgradable self-driving capabilities and performance that surpasses supercars.
A vehicle whose only real competition is: The Dodge Charger Hellcat.
FCA has the market penetration.
They have the factories.
If Apple and Google can create the tech, Fiat-Chrysler can create a set of self-driving cars that work on day one of production, not 5 or 10 years from now.
Imagine the Fiat 500e, but self-driving and with an electric range far beyond a kitchen appliance chucked out a window.
literally, the CEO said: “I hope you don’t buy [the Fiat 500e] because every time I sell one it costs me $14,000,” to the audience at the Brookings Institute
You want to take on Tesla?
You’d better come prepared.
Marchionne knows that. And he’s playing the long game.
never question a man in a sweater